For Whose Gain? Self-Sustained or God Sustained

by Mike Chong Perkinson

Josh McDowell, author and lecturer, says these revealing words about himself:

Almost every dysfunction is a truth out of balance. I had lost hope of ever being in control of my life. The dominant childhood feeling for me was to be important. My dominant fear was the fear of dying without being important. I believe it motivated me in a lot of the books, videos, films, to say ‘yes,’ and talk about myself. 2 Corinthians 12:9 says, ‘And He said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.’ That gave me courage. If I always do what I’ve always done, I’ll always be what I’ve always been. I’ve asked God to bring me to the point where my outer ‘no’ will be an inner ‘no’, and my outer ‘yes’ will be an inner ‘yes’.

“God showed me I need to live this out, so that I can be a healthy person. I must deny myself, those patterns of response that are unpleasing to God. In the last few years, I’ve seen more things in my life that I don’t like, but I’ve never been more excited because I’m growing. I’m really becoming free. If we’re all supposed to be perfect, we wouldn’t need unconditional love. So often in the church, when you look good, when you have no problems, they applaud you. When you go to Alcoholics Anonymous, if you have a problem, they applaud you. In the church we often look good and get worse. In Alcoholics Anonymous you look worse, and get better. I’m getting better. It’s my response to mature in the Holy Spirit. I thank God that He’s alive and working in my life. (Taken from Alan Nelson, Broken In The Right Places, pp. 198-199)

One of the greatest struggles we face as leaders, for that matter as Christians, is that our fallen human nature, motivated by fear, causes us to lean upon ourselves and draw upon our own soul strength, upon our talent, gifts, knowledge, magnetism, eloquence or cleverness. All too often our ministry endeavors are self-serving as Josh McDowell so honestly states. We do it to feel better, relieve guilt, find identity, to feel important, be needed, etc. In contrast, ministry in its purest form give life rather than taking life. Ministry in Christ takes the attention off of oneself, providing life. However, neurotic service (takes life) indicates a desire or need for attention and may result from guilt or a need for approval rather than selfless love. Maybe we should call this the parasitic leadership. As Tom Johnston says, “a protégé wants what is in your heart and parasite wants what is in your hand.”

Recognizing that our inner worlds and outer worlds are not always in harmony is a challenge for all of us. Acting holy and mastering the behaviors is much easier than overcoming the internal world of motivation. For example, you know whether or not you’re really a servant by the way you react in your heart when you’re treated like one. As leaders, we embrace the ideology of being servants for Christ, understanding it conceptually. In reality, we tend to live from our fear and insecurity rather than the grace, freedom and love in Christ. The true test of whether or not we are genuine, authentic servants of God, and not just people who want a place for ourselves, is when we get down to the simple task of serving. Those who are servants are really interested in serving Christ by serving the other. The gain of the Kingdom is their objective. Jesus flows through us for His gain. Those who are not are more interested in how and where they serve, not to mention with whom they serve. Self-gain is baptized in scriptural language and is their objective. We use Jesus for personal gain.

Who am I when I am alone with God? Who am I when no one is looking? Is my inner world and outer world the same? Or, at least moving in the direction of being the same? Am I growing in Christ’s love or simply growing in my duties? How would our spouse’s truly describe our life in Christ? How would our children describe our life in Christ?

Our style of leadership, based in Jesus, is “incarnational.” An old adage typifies my point: “Every man has three names; one his father and mother give him; one others call him; and one he acquires himself.” What is the name you and I are acquiring for ourselves? Incarnational leadership means one must lead primarily out of who one is and not what one knows, who one knows, what one can do, or how one can do it. Henri Nouwen says it well: “Christian leadership is not a leadership of power and control, but a leadership of powerlessness and humility in which the suffering servant of God, Jesus Christ, is made manifest. I, obviously, am not speaking about a psychologically weak leadership in which the Christian leader is simply the passive victim of the manipulations of his milieu. No, I am speaking of a leadership in which power is constantly abandoned in favor of love.” (In The Name of Jesus, p. 63) We are then, to be just like Jesus, who became a man, humbling Himself and being of no reputation, and being obedient to the point of death. Unless we allow the power of God to impact us, the reality of His presence will be circumvented. Jesus must be in us, in order for Him to be given away.

It is precisely the lack of humility (motivated by fear) before God that is the root cause of nearly all leadership problems. For example, if the power resources transcend the character strength of the individual, collapse or a moral lapse is inevitable. Simply, God does not work through us greatly until we recognize our impotence. The lyrics of an old song reinforce my point, “If you want to be great in God’s Kingdom learn to be the servant of all.”

All of this to say, we must be honest before God and before some trusted brothers and sisters in Christ, confessing our sins and allowing God to daily transform our hearts into the Image of His Son. It is one thing to be positionally saved through Christ’s atoning work. It is another to be relationally saved in Christ, abiding in the Vine daily as He stretches the capacity of our hearts to reflect His life, love and nature (Galatians 2:20; 5:22-23). And so, let’s abandon power in favor of love. Just in case it is not obvious enough yet, start at home. Live Jesus with your family. Our ministry begins with Jesus and me (son/daughter), Jesus and my family (servant), and Jesus and my calling (servant and steward). Redeemed life begins from the heart, resulting in a transformed individual radically in love with Christ, loving others as they love themselves, and reproducing the life and love of Jesus in others (making disciples).